GI Joe Loses His Identity

There was once a time when GI Joe was called, "The Great American Hero". Well, Joe has left the fascist USA and is heading for Brussels:

While some remember the character from its gung-ho fighting man '60s incarnation, he's evolved. G.I. Joe is now a Brussels-based outfit that stands for Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, an international co-ed force of operatives who use hi-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil organization headed by a double-crossing Scottish arms dealer.

That's the new definition of *Evolving*? Shit, I'd rather resort back to my ape-like ancestors.

Paramount pictures and Hasbro have to be commended for such a fine decision. It's no longer cool to be an American hero, it's way cooler to be a peacekeeper, a guy with a blue beret. Paramount and Hasbro have great vision.

Throw in an insane Scottish arms dealers (cuz you can't swing a cat anywhere in the world without hitting a Scottish arms dealer) and you have the making for an incredible movie. It does worry me, however, now that GI Jean is a peacekeeper (UN, no doubt), does that mean he's going to have sex with little African children, just like a real peacekeeper from Belgium would do?

Stop right there! Do not cross the zone or we will be forced to write a harshly worded letter to your government. Good job GI Joe, look at those Scottish people run!

For the love of haggis