Lindsay Lohan Arrested For This And That

I'm so confident that you don't care one iota about Lindsay Lohan and her revolting life, that I'm going to tell you a story about something that happened to me tonight instead of narrating this piece of Lindsay Lohan news:

Hollywood starlet Lindsay Lohan has been busted for drunk driving and drug possession, just days after completing an alcohol treatment program following her arrest in May for similar charges.

I went for a three mile run tonight, it's part of a cardio-endurance fitness thing I've been into for the last six months. To increase my endurance, I run with a backpack on with 30 lbs of rocks in the sack. Hold on...

Lohan - who has been voluntarily wearing an alcohol monitoring bracelet since completing rehab on July 13 - was initially detained in lieu of $US25,000 bail before being released.

Anyway, I finished my run and I came home to The Manor for a shower. TLDG was good enough to run the water for me, and I jumped into a beautifully cool and refreshing shower, just the way I like it. For the love of God, one sec:

Celebrity news website TMZ.com reports that Lohan had also been charged with possession of cocaine. Sources told the website Lohan's blood alcohol level was between 0.12 and 0.13, well above California's legal limit of 0.8.

So, I'm showering away, la de deeee, la de daaa, and I go to pick up the soap and it flies up in the air, like only soap can do, and I go to grab it and I knock it up higher, and when it's coming down I tried to grab it and it flies through my hand...Jesus, this is annoying, hold up:

Lohan is due to appear in court August 24 to face those charges.

And somehow smacks me square in the balls. A bar of soap bagged me. Is that crazy, or what?

True story, tell your friends.