Whats for Dinner!

The one argument of Vegetarianism that really has any fibre is the 'if you cannot kill and clean it yourself, you should not eat it'. That is why tonights selection is Lobster.

You can pick up live lobster in quite a few places here in Toronto. I like to take them home and give them a few weeks of recovery in a special tank I have built in the basement. There, the Lobster-Canadians are fattened up, and their flesh marinated internally through judicious choice of foods. Lobsters eat just about anything, and that anything can be selected to make them tasty.

A refreshed lobster is far more sporting than one that is sickly. If you were a gladiator, would you want to chop up some cringing slave, or would you rather work up an honest sweat in battle with a healthy barbarian? The choice is obvious.

Before doing battle for dinner with dinner, I burn incense and offer up prayers to Set, the Snake God. Set smiles with his many teeth when his devotees kill and eat something. Especially if there is some element of conflict involved. And, lets face it, a healthy lobster can do some wicked damage with those claws. If you do not believe me, just let your finger, toe, or testicle get into striking range of one of those claws. Advanced students of Set will do battle with their dinner lobster naked, in a slimy tank filled with ice water. You can then look any vegetarian in the eye, and spit in it with good conscious.

After doing battle with the Lobster, you can shovel out the carcass and any spilled guts into a bucket, and let the cook do what ever they do to make a delicious lobster dinner. Mmmmmm. Serve with lemon, butter, bread, and veggies.

I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this.