Did you hear the one about the Polack, his drinking buddies and immigration Canada??

So a Polack staggers into immigration Canada with a claim...

"The Applicant states that he is a severe alcoholic who will relapse should he return to the friends in Poland who encourage him to drink," reads a Federal Court decision released this month.

In his refugee application, Tadeusz Jasiel, 50, states that if he can't get political asylum in Canada he'll probably drink his way into an insane asylum in Poland. He argues that such "a cruel and unusual punishment" would be tantamount to "a danger of torture."

Welcome to Canada Mr. Jasiel, here's the keys to a new Hyundai.

He said if he hit the bottle again it would certainly break his mother's heart, and likely expose him to ridicule, or worse.

"I might be considered in Poland a subject of public opprobrium and be forcefully confined to a psychiatric institution for life," Mr. Jasiel wrote. "Everyone knows that there is zero tolerance in Poland for people like me."

Yes, we certainly wouldn't want him to become the subject of ridicule or anything. At least his story isn't plastered on the front page of Neale News , that would be embarrassing.

It turns out he has been denied refugee status. Booooo! It doesn't seem fair, I guess you don't get any points for originality.

He did go about it the wrong way though. What he should have done was gotten rid of all his identification, limped into the refugee board hearing, told them he's from a new religion that if found out in Poland they would have eaten him. And then say that he really digs gay penguins. THAT'S how you gain entrance to Canada, silly.

Article here.