Alchemy and Artillery

Just as in Alchemy there are three modes that the four elements can take, so too there are three types of artillery rounds.

Air Burst. By far the cheapest of artillery, it is also the most effective at killing people and pets. A simple tube of concrete can supply the aggregate shrapnel; a cheap-o, economy burster charge, and a cheap fuse.

Ground Burst. Second most expensive round. It requires some machining, more expensive steels, a better (more stable) burster charge, and the fuse has to be able to take a good thunk. On the plus side, this type of artillery round can host a diversity of mixtures. Blast effects, fire starters, poison gas, can all be combined.

Armor Piercing. Hideously expensive. This round is basically about as expensive per weight as a Timex. And, they rarely actually work. There are not very many actual targets. Each round is specialized. And, they chew up artillery pieces when they are fired.

If Air Burst artillery rounds are so cheap and so effective, why has not Stephen Harper used them to subjugate the homeless and promote lies about Global Warming?

Unfortunately, for two reasons: Firstly, soldiers, being a crafty lot, have a heightened awareness of hazards. This type of shell is rarely effective against soldiers. You cannot hit what you cannot see. Secondly, civilians, under an air burst bombardment, soon learn that hiding in holes will keep themselves alive.

Air burst attacks against civilian populations, while great earners of carbon credits, rarely retain their effectiveness as the thinning number of humans soon becomes wary and holes in safe places.

In this, air burst artillery corresponds to the mutable mode. In astrology, Gemini rules air burst artillery. The Austrian engineer, scientist, and artillery general, Winkelschlieffer, who perfected a safe fuse for artillery, was a Gemini.

This leaves us with Ground Burst artillery as our artillery round of choice. This easily corresponds to the fixed mode. All of the four elements have this mode: Scorpio for Water, Leo for Fire, Aquarius for Air, and Taurus for Earth.

Scorpio corresponds to poison gas ground burst artillery. In this, a further correspondence to the Scorpio ruled beast that is the three-headed guard dog of Hades, Cerberus. As Cerberus has three heads, so there are three types of poison gas ground burst artillery. In short, there are gasses that attack the blood stream. These are the choking gases. Then, there are gasses that attack the brain, causing it to not work. These are the nerve gases. Lastly, there are those gases that attack exposed skin, causing it to bubble and smoulder. These weapons aim to liquify human flesh. Thus, the classic verse about Cerberus, that the fearsome creature had 'three slavering jaws, three gullets, but only one stomach' (Numidius, 3,XXI,xvii)

Leo corresponds to incendiary ground burst artillery. Thick slabs of phosphorus metal, magnesium slugs, and sodium slagifiers, are common fillings. They are usually sandwiched between layers of other pyrotechnical material, much as a burger is augmented with pickles, tomato, and relish.

Aquarius corresponds to anti-personel ground burst artillery. Civilized people consider the use of this round to be a war crime. Aquarius rules war crimes (Leek 5,221).

Taurus corresponds to blast ground burst artillery. Blast effects are generally spectacular, but limited to a circular footprint. Cratering effects are extensive and require workers with tools for repair. The satisfying thud of a shell, the spectacular display of strewn guts, and the crisp, circular scorch line, all speak of Taurus (Numidius 3,III,xvii).

There you have it.

I, Sargon the Magnificent, wrote this under duress. Fenris has me locked up in some computer room. It is in a tall office building. I have tried shouting to people in the building next door. I have held up signs. But they ignore me. I am on the fourteeth floor. I can see Front street. Where am I?

Fenris turns the heat off if I do not do his data processing. The food is dropped down through a hole. He feeds me take out from the food court. I chronic gas. It wakes me up from my sleep.

Help free me from slavery. Send Fenris your money. When he has five thousand of your dollars, he will free me.