Women Are Grumpier Than Men

And chocolate makes ya fat, tell me something I don't know:

Women are grumpier than men in the morning, a survey has found.

The report, which confirms what many men have long believed, adds insult to injury by saying women also stay in a bad mood for longer.

The survey by The Sleep Council, found 24 per cent of men say they never wake up grumpy, as opposed to only 14 per cent of women.

It also found that 13 per cent of women stayed in a bad mood for two to four hours, compared to 10 per cent of men.

Some women come out of the womb and stay in a bad mood for 86 years. Truth.

The logical explanation why women wake up grumpy and stay in a bad mood, often has to do with the visit they get once a month from Aunty Flo and her traveling blood circus. There will be men you meet that seem in a bad mood, but often they aren't in a bad mood at all, they're actually just stupid assholes. However, think of all the moody women you know, who, every time you are around them you are walking on eggshells, watching every word you say, afraid that at any moment they will pull off your nutsac and swallow your testicles just for shits and giggles. Scary, isn't it?

This is why anyone would be silly to vote for Lisa as Mayor of Mitchieville. Do you really want irrational, bleeding women making important governmental decisions for you, or would you rather have a level-headed, non-bleeding, non-moody man making smarter decisions? That's what I thought. As the saying goes, "You can't trust anything that bleeds for a full week out of the month and doesn't die".

Can I get a hallelujah?

Women get hysterical. PERIOD.