Inside Fenrisville - September 2, 2008

Unlike the current administration, the new and improved leadership of Fenris Badwulf, Mayor of Mitchieville, will take swift and cost-effective action to fight the evils of smoking, of second hand smoke, and underfunding of anti-smoking activist initiatives, through aggressive spending initiatives! And what more vulnerable segment of our society than heteronormative white males in the demographic between 12 and 18? As your new First Citizen, First Among Equals, I, Fenris Badwulf, promise You, the People of Mitchieville, will spend lots of money on studies, reports, activists to create studies, progressives to read reports, and telemarketers to call you at dinner and on the toilet and while you have sex. No more will our young men going through puberty be unaware of the perils of smoking! Aaaargh!

Our Global Warming Warning science team, under the leadership of our municipal astrologer, Sargon the Magnificent, has shown that these sort of posters are very effective at getting the attention of our downtrodden white heteronormative male youth. Let us talk more about talking about action to do something maybe later about the perils of smoking amoung this vital demographic. Posters are but the first of many spending initiatives to be explored by Fenris Badwulf, future Mayor of Mitchieville. Rush, hurry, and make haste to support yourself by sending Fenris your money.


This poster exemplifies the three cardinal points of interest to the targeted demographic. We must make our white heteronormative youth not want to smoke, as well as give them a message of the equality of the sexes, and of diversity. Here we see a feminist role model, a person of strength and intellegence, turn aside from chewing tobacco to the more healthy rolled cigarette form. Let me spend your money to stop young women from chewing tobacco and we will have made a vital step in addressing underfunding in anti-chewing tobacco awareness. Let everyone not give less, so that I can spend more. I care.


Diversity is the one of the cornerstones in the mud hut of multi-culturalism. And what communicates the concept of diversity more than Blonde, Brunette, and Red-head? This is a message of progressive logic that appeal to our young white heteronormative males, exposed to the evils of tobacco advertising. Let us outspend the tobacco industry! And, let the subliminal text of progressiveismisms be write large with vibrant icons, such as this renowned anti-smoking actress, LaLabia Badwulf.


This fourth poster demonstrates the timelessness of the wisdom of not smoking while wearing flammable clothing. The actress is dressed in the simple costume of a Toronto night entertainment industry worker, one devoted to servicing and satisfying the needs of our proletarian working classes. As a specialist, trained to be both firm and direct, she gives a strong message of maybe you should be thinking about smoking a little bit even if you are thinking alot about the mechanism of Darwinian gene swapping. We need more spending!

We care about every downtrodden smoker here in Mitchieville. As their faces are ground into the mud of addiction by the black patent leather stilleto boot of the tobacco industry, Fenris Badwulf, future Mayor of Mitchieville is working to bring you the discipline of anti-smoking programs to all branches of the Mitchieville Public Library. Courses are free, and run after sunset. You may wish to bring a few crisp pink fifties, to buy bubble gum.


Who but Fenris Badwulf, future Mayor of Mitchieville gives you what you want? I care.