Canadian Youth Set Each Other On Fire For Fun

My brutha from a different baby mutha sent me an article today which seemed to dumbfound him. He was incredulous and needed an explanation for it. Okay, I won't keep you in suspense any longer. Man, you can be such a baby sometimes:

CANADIAN teens have found a new pastime - dousing each other with body spray before setting each other on fire.

Ontario police said they were aware that students were taking body sprays to school and lighting others ablaze - usually for a split second.

Some light their pants on fire, while others bare their stomachs before squirting the spray and flicking a lighter, canada.com reported.

The revelation follows the case of a 14-year-old boy who suffered third-degree burns to his stomach when another male student doused him with spray and set him on fire.

Well, I guess the secret is out--Canadians love setting themselves, and others, on fire.

Don't ask me why, but we've been doing this since Confederation. The reason behind it is that John A. MacDonald, Canada's first Prime Minister, started it by lighting Sir Charles Tupper ablaze. James Cockburn followed suit by lighting George Brown on fire and the next thing you know, everyone and their uncle Bob were doing the pyro shuffle.

No one really knows why MacDonald set Tupper ablaze, but rumour has it that Tupper asked MacDonald for a pen to sign the Confederation with. MacDonald responded to Tupper, saying, "What the fuck is a pen?" Well, one thing led to another, Tupper called MacDonald's wife a slut, MacDonald kicked Tupper in the balls and spat in his mouth, threw some kerosene on him and burned the bastard.

True story, make it a Wiki entry if you can. And then submit it to Digg.