The Mayor's Linkie Love

Since I was about 12 or 13, I started signing other peoples credit card receipts with a funny name as a haha joke. Visa doesn't care, even if there's an X where the signature should go, they're happy. If I was to guess how many strange/funny names I've written on credit card receipts over the years, without exaggeration I would say in the range of 300.

It's funny to do, but something happened the other night that I'm thinking may have put an end to my falsifying signatures.

TLDG took me out to Canyon Creek the other night for a nice meal. Everything was going well, the food was good, the waiter wasn't a prick, the atmosphere was fine, but then the bill came. Even though TLDG paid by credit card, they gave the receipt to me. Without hesitation I took it and signed my name, "Adolph Hitlers Mustache".

We thought nothing of it, as I've said, I've done it literally hundreds of times. Well, dontchaknow it, but TLDG was out of gas a few days later and tried to fill up by using her credit card and guess what wasn't working any more? Ya.

Seems the Visa police think there was something fishy about that credit card signature and decided to suspend her card until further review. It's an understatement to say she is not very impressed with me right now.

I still don't think it's my fault, as I told TLDG, don't blame me, blame Hitlers Mustache, he's the real criminal in all this.

You have probably received an email similar to this over the years, but What People Say in Court is still worth a chuckle or two if you haven't seen it in a while.

Those two fat commie rejects, Ben and Jerry, are giving away a free scoop of ice cream at most of their locations sometime soon. I wish I could tell you the exact date, but my investigative skills are on empty right now. However, they have a store locator that will give you more info. Thanks Ben and Jerry, you douche-clowns.

I think the best way to describe Kaleidocycles is: You get these things and do some stuff and then crap happens. Somehow, it works out to be very cool.

UBC Library's Rare Books and Special Collections holds one of the world's largest collections of maps and guidebooks of the Japanese Tokugawa period, ca. 1600-1867. Most of this collection was acquired from George H. Beans, the original collector, and is accompanied by his inventory A List of Japanese Maps of the Tokugawa Era.

You knew it was only a matter of time, but now you can make your very own, "Dick in a Box". If someone ever shows me their dick in a box, I'm going to show them my foot to their groin.

I do consider a one-legged salsa dancer an incredible thing. However, a no-legged salsa dancer would be 50% better.

So, apparently 1 dead *insurgent* gets 72 virgins when he gets to heaven, right? Well, they better start cranking out the virgin machine, cuz there are a shitload of dead insurgents coming.

And to think I paid $200 for a woman to beg me to violently whip her. I should move to Africa.

I really dig these beautiful pictures of Niagara Falls from the air. I mean, I much prefer the previous link where those African women get whipped, but the Niagara pics are a close second.

I'm checking out some Olson pictures of when they were younger and comparing them to some recent pictures of them, and one thing I can't get get out of my mind is that I'm not so sure that these two creatures were ever cute. Correct me if I'm wrong, were these chicks ever cute?

In retrospect, I should have gone with an old favourite and simply signed, "Your Momma", but I'm always pushing the envelope. Serves me right, I suppose.