Politically Correct Workplace Wisdom

The Diversity embracing German Vegetarian Socialist Peoples Pacifist Party held consensus over Germany throughout the crisis years of the 1930's and early 1940's. During this time, their Supreme Vegetarian Leader initiated important arms reduction and population growth movements, as in Poland in 1939, then in France, Holland, Belgium, and Norway in 1940, and finally in Russia in 1941. In most of these multicultural happenings, the evil forces of America sought to silence their voices and suppress the vision of the Berlin Vegetarian Village Peoples. By December of 1941, the Imperialist War Faction of the Republican Party, barely contained by the progressive wings of the Democratic party, had committed the vast earth destroying resources of the United States against the Berlin Vegetarians along with their Progressive Axis Partners, the Feminists of Rome and the Kyoto-Tokyo Multi-Culturalists. This was a defeat for Women's Right to Choose.

Although this was a sad time for the progressive activist movement, we can learn important lessons in Workplace Wisdom that can be implemented today. Infact, let us explore the ways that the Vegetarian Socialists of 1933 uplifted their diverse workforce to face the challenges and tough questions of their times.

Construction sites are organized along a heirarchical basis similiar to that of the socialist utopia ... the ant colony. Here, workers are divided into four castes: Apprentice, Journeyman, Foreman, and Over Foreman. We suggest three cultural lessons from the Vegetarian Socialist period:

1) Use of Inspirational Songs to Motivate Production. Begin your work day early with a happy company productivity anthem! Let your workers rejoice with an easily sung four-four beat rhythm with uplifting words celebrating the work that generates taxes for our Strong Central Government in Ottawa. Workers of all castes can sing various production hymns, corporate pride chants, and breaktime songs.

2) Use of Inspired Meetings to foster Politcal Awareness. Currently, workers only enjoy Safety Meetings. This can be improved and uplifted to a political realm by having additonal daily meetings on subjects of a necessary nature on such things as Liberal Party Doctrine, Great Leaders of the Liberal Party, Prosperity from Liberal Party Direction, and Evil Enemies of the Liberal Party. To add a multi-cultural flavor to these inspiring sessions, a diversity of iced beverages can be served, such as beer, wine, vodka, gin, rye, rum, scotch, bourbon, and whiskey. On special occasions, such as a Production Quota being Accomplished or Pay Day, fellow workers from the Prostitutes Guild can be brought in for a work skills exchange. A few Winnebago camper vehicles and an Instant-Teller equipped truck will travel with the Guild Workers. This will reduce absenteeism and hence increase the tax revenue which is so necessary for social spending.

3) Use of Armbands to Dignify Worker Castes. Most work sites now use different colored helmets to signify different trades. Time to go the next logical step and use armbands to signify trade and caste. I suggest the use of a simple two color armband (unique to the trade) with a white circle . In this circle is a suitable symbol to the Foreman led Kamphgruppe. Usually some Germanic Rune is used, but this is only limited by ones imagination. Apprentices, being the lowest form of worker, will have a simple, unadorned armband. Journeymen will have a silver chain design worked in embroidery around their Kamphgruppe symbol. Foreman will have a gold chain design. Over Foreman will have golden oak leaves. Other regalia can be added as needed for inspiration our our tax producing work force ... perhaps Iron Cross ribbons for superior workers, or Co-worker of Stalin Souvenir Pencils in three grades: Gold, Silver, or Bronze.

When you combine these three simple improvements, a little singing, some drinking on the job with prostitutes, and the wearing of armbands, you will have a more policially correct, diversity embracing workplace. Ask your boss to implement these needed reforms today.

I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this.