The lamest study ever

I'm sure you have noticed that I post an awful lot of studies on the pages of Mitchieville. Sometimes they are interesting, unique or downright fascinating. Sometimes they are just stupid as hell:

While women might be better at browsing and buying in bulk, men come out on top when it comes to being decisive shoppers, according to a recently released study.

The Brunel study says men have traditionally been hunters, while women have filled the role of the gatherer -- collecting and managing resources. The roles play through in shopping habits as men head into a store knowing exactly what they want, find the right size and then buy it.

Shocking. Absolutely shocking. I'm glad there was a study issued to reveal such extraordinary news, because I'll be frank, I never knew this was true.

I always thought it was the man that did the majority of the shopping. Whenever I go to a mall I always see it jammed-packed with male shoppers. Miles and miles of plaid and work boots, as far as the eye can see. Men just love browsing and window shopping, looking at all the gee-gaws and trinklets, trying on all the new fashions. My friends, OBJ and Bob Noxious , or as I like to call them, "My little bitches" and I, love to head down to the mall every day and go bargain hunting. Of course we have to fight off all the other men for a chance at unbelievable savings, but it's always worth it.

You can take the man out of the mall, but you can't take the mall out of the man. The one common complaint we men have is that after we come home from a busy day at the Le Senza, we usually walk in our house to find our wives/girlfriends asleep on the couch. The dinner isn't made, there are clothes just thrown on the floor, the place is a total wreck. This sends us into a tither, it's hard to live that way.

A note to all the women of Mitchieville: Clean up after yourself, try doing some work around the house, don't cut your toe-nails at the kitchen table, and for God's sake, please put the toilet seat down. And one last thing, leave the shopping to us. If you follow these simple rules, we won't cry as much.