Salmonella Is Destroying The Universe

Tomato anarchy is running wild in North America, as more restaurants have pulled the tomato from their menus over fears of salmonella:

Tim Hortons has also stopped serving tomatoes at its more than 2,800 stores in Canada and almost 400 U.S. outlets.

McDonald's Canada stopped serving sliced tomatoes over the weekend, but the company reports no problems at its Canadian outlets.

U.S. McDonald's restaurants followed the Canadian lead Monday, pulling sliced tomatoes from all of its sandwiches until the source of the "Saintpaul" salmonella infection is known.

Taco Bell Corp. in the U.S. has also stopped serving tomatoes and several U.S. grocery chains including Winn-Dixie Stores, Ralphs, Vons and Albertsons have stopped selling red plum, red Roma or round red varieties, which the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention suspects are the source of the bacteria.

Just another sign of the impending apocalypse. Mark my words, we are living in the end times.

It seems odd to me that you can get salmonella from tomatoes, from chicken and eggs, yet I've never heard of anyone ever getting salmonella from salmon. I want you to try to wrap your head around that for the next few weeks as this salmonella outbreak destroys our country. Sure, some people will tell you that salmonella is named after a Dr. Salmon who discovered it, but let's face it, that's what they want you to believe.

That sounds a little fishy to me...