A Question for the Readers of Mitchieville

I have a question I would like to ask my kids, but they took off to Michigan with their mom and step-dad this morning so I can’t ask them. I will now turn to you, oh sage readers of Mitchieville, and ask this all important question. “Kids, what course of events transpired in our kitchen this morning that resulted in a 'Fruit by-the Foot' being wrapped around the legs of two chrome chairs and left in a sticky ball under our kitchen table?" Bruce handles things like this every day, where the hell is he? Cairn, I would have a hard time believing that this has never happened to you before…