Think Globally, Act Locally, and Demand Handouts!

Sunday, November 06, 2005

You are an Army of One

Pay Attention.

You are an Army of One. Right now as you read this.

There is peril all around. You are now the first soldier of your own Army of Survival. Death is coming. Death is coming for you. Natural Disaster may strike ... you have seen it on television. It could be your bloated body floating in the stinking water. Looters may swarm up from the bad part of town. Then you will be the charred or headless corpse. Your Government does not care ... in some places it has it's hands tied by Political Correctness and cannot act, in other places it is Progressive and is a useful idiot of the Looters. You may believe that Order will be Restored before you have to act. That is your gamble, and when you look around you will see that the herd is living in quiet fear, afraid to act. You will survive, and you are going to start fighting for survival right now...

Here is what you must do:

1) Recruit Allies. Discover like minded people who believe as you do. Qualify them. Can you seek shelter with them if your house is burnt by looters? Would you shelter them in the same circumstances?

2) Gather Resources. What do you need to survive? Start right now to gather it up. You will need food, water, clothing. What about your personal economy? Do you have the means to contiue to survive ... a car, tools, raw materials? Start getting it together tonight. Go to the store and start to horde canned food. Winter is coming ... can you sleep in a place with no heat?

3) Prepare your body for Combat. You are at War. The environment will try to kill you with cold, with rain, with disease, and with famine. Are you ready? Start to train your body with exercise. The Looters will come into your neighbourhood. They will take what you need to survive. They will steal your car, your food, and rape you. You know what you must do, so, do it.

4) Identify your Enemies. Your Killers are the Environment and the Looter Clans. What life destroying weather can you expect where you live? Prepare for it. You know the electricity will fail. The Police will not come. The city will burn. There are no Firemen. Then the Looters will come, out of the night and into the firelight and the smoke of your burning village. Some Looters are strong, and some are weak. Some you can resist, and from some you must hide. Most Looters will run from a righteous man, but some are not human. If you are alone, you will probably die. Then they will mutilate your body. But, if you are many, then you may live to see the sunset through the drifting clouds of smoke.

This is your Basic Training. If you survive, there will be more instructions.

My name is Maximinus Thrax, and I am going to see another sunrise. Maybe you will too.

posted by The Mayor at 11:00 PM

|

Submit this post to ... StumbleUpon | Digg | del.icio.us


<< Home

Contributors

  • command economy
  • Reg
  • The Mayor
  • Fenris Badwulf
Donations To The Christian Children's Fund
  • Click HERE and see why.

Best Canadian Blog The 2007 Weblog Awards Mitchieville Kicks Ass!

Previous Posts

  • Horoscope for the week of November 6, 2005
  • Charity Picnic this Sunday
  • And now, the Answer
  • Jessica Alba will be the death of me
  • Gimme that old time Religion
  • Announcement!
  • Ben Stiller is Demanding
  • MENSA Question #14
  • Britney kicks out KFed
  • She should have gone with the 9 Iron
    • Mitchieville Cabinet

    • Campaign Manager
    • Re-Educationer-Fenris Badwulf
    • House Leaders
    • Parliamentary Chef
    • Defence Minister
    • Finance Minister
    • Native Affairs
    • Munitions - Reg
    • Culture & Arts
    • Information Minister
    • Environment Minister
    • Womyn's Affairs
    • Religious Affairs
    • Senate

    • Cannuckistan Chronicles
    • Florida Cracker
    • The Leather Penguin
    • Marginalized ACTION Dinosaur
    • Mean Ol' Meanie
    • Backbenchers

    • 49th Parallel
    • Angry
    • Attu
    • Battle of Ontario
    • Blazing Cat Fur
    • Blog Quebecois
    • Catprint in the Mash
    • Dangerous Logic
    • Don Surber
    • Dr Mookie Love
    • Enig-Mac
    • Enjoy Every Sandwich
    • Grant Miller Media
    • Grouchy Old Cripple
    • Ice Princess
    • Kathy Shadle
    • Keyser Söze
    • Knowledge is Power
    • Last Of The Few
    • Limits of Respectability
    • Loganotron
    • Mean Ol' Meanie
    • Mugs
    • OMMAG
    • Proud To Be Canadian
    • Rumcorps
    • Right off The Shore
    • Samantha Burns
    • Six Meat Buffet
    • Small Dead Animals
    • Steamboat McGoo
    • Taylor & Company
    • The Digital Brownshirt
    • The Drunken Stepfather
    • The Halls of Macadamia
    • The Last Amazon
    • The Daily Bayonet
    • Wonder Woman
    • Enemies of the State

    • Commissar Suvorov
    • dmorris
    • Dmorris
    • Lisa
    • DINO
    • dmorris
    • Reg
    • dmorris
    • Fenris
    • dmorris
    • Political Prisoners

    • Jack’s Newswatch
    • Purple Tory
    • The Black Rod
    • The Trusty Tory
    • Unambiguously Ambidextrous
    • Humor

      Powered by Blogger


      Mitchieville is worth $100,000,000.00.
      and your blog isn't.


    All content property of The Mayor, unless otherwise noted. This is under a creative commons license.

    Subscribe with Bloglines

    stats count