Friday Night Male Flesh - Wedding Essentials

I want to start off by offering my warm congratulations to the Mayor and his bride to be. We Californians have recently joined league with our fair neighbor to the North is recognizing marriage for all citizens. So, my interest in marriage has suddenly been piqued. In fact, I'm now starting to think about the essential items that are necessary for a wedding. Because, you know, someday maybe even I'll get hitched!

Everyone knows the basics: tux, wedding ring, brides and/or grooms, etc. And for the bride you've got to have something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue. But what about the groom? What essential items should he have? Well, I dug around the Internet and turned up two very important photos to help start to solve this puzzle.

These guys all seem to feel that a tux shirt and jacket are totally optional. However, it would seem that they value a few other important items: hairspray, facial hair, mullets, perms, white cummerbunds, gold chains, and chest hair. Hrm, I'm not sure about you Mayor, but I don't think I can grow that much chest hair and I think I'd loose my membership to the Homosexualist Club if I grew a mullet or got a perm. I think I can manage the rest, though.

Never in a million years would I have thought to dress up my buddy down below for my wedding. Of course I knew I had to wear a bow tie around my neck. But thankfully I found this picture and now I know that I'm also supposed to wear two bow ties. And who wouldn't want to wear a silver thong underneath their tux? I certainly wouldn't miss this special opportunity to put on a sexy silver thong. Mayor: Imagine the fun your newlywed wife will have on the honeymoon as she discovers you in such sexy boy undies!

 

And what wedding would be complete without sexy man candy? Every bachelor party needs its entertainment. Louis here certainly would keep me entertained. In fact, I might be inclined to take Louis along on the honeymoon too! Mayor, I'm presuming Reg's female specimens this week will be more in line with what you're thinking for bachelor party fun. I just couldn't resist sharing Louis here for all the lady folk in Mitchieville.

Let's review. Based on what I've uncovered Mayor, you'll need the following items to have a successful wedding: plentiful facial and chest hair, a mullet and/or perm, gold chains, and most importantly, special tuxedo-themed packaging for your special package! Hope my research has been useful.

I and all the readers of  Loganotron wish the Mayor and Mrs. Mayor all the happiest of days. Until next time, remember: Studies show that a weekly dose of Man Flesh actually improves your heterosexual health!