Hunt Continues For Man That Eats Women

Police continue to hunt for a man in the jungles of Papua New Guinea who is accused of eating women:

Scores of police have been sent to the jungles of remote Papua New Guinea to hunt for a cult leader known as the Black Jesus, who is said to have sacrificed three young women to the devil and eaten their bodies.

In one case reported by villagers, a mother who had fallen under the cult leader's spell led her 14-year-old daughter to his hideout, offered her to him as a virgin then stabbed her to death.

I'll be perfectly honest with you, when I first heard that the police were looking for a man that eats women, I thought the story would be a little sexier than this. I mean, I thought it was about the whole man/eating/women thing. I am being clear, aren't I? See, I was thinking that when the coppers were looking for a man that eats women, I thought they were looking for a man that eats women. Get what I'm saying? I'm saying that I thought the article was about a man that, you know...Christ, do I have to spell it out for you? I do? I thought it was about a man who was wanted by the cops because of his oral sex prowess. There, I said it. Good job making me feel dirty.

Eat me? How 'bout a kiss first.