Hammer and Anvil
Well, I take a few days off , and Toronto, City of Light, racks up murder number eighty.
Opinion at the lunch room table was a solid who cares. And in this, another bright-futured Black kid, sent into the ground, with a chorus of wailing baby mommas (no dad though, this is No-Dad City *, after all), and a line up of testifying scholars, journalists, and judiciary, all wringing their fingers over the shocking waste of potential. Yeah, sure.
Anyway, whats-his-name, lets just call him number eighty, or just whaz’zitz, is only going to be missed by those that knew him. He may get his picture in the paper if The Capitalist Sun does a new and improved Year of the Gun! as Boxing Day filler for a slow news day.
But what about his school teachers? Surely whaz’zitz is going to be mourned by his kindergarten teacher. Sure it was an unlucky thirteen years ago that whaz’zitz was a cute kid in her class, but our Canadian kindergarten teachers are a caring lot. This argument also applies to his grade one teacher, too. Infact, for all his home room teachers, from K to 12. That is thirteen humans who now have an empty spot in their lives because one of their students is now being chopped up for spare parts, the rest so much worm friendly compost. Yup, they care.
But what about his social workers? Growing up in the gritty new subdivision slums of the troubled neighbourhoods of North-East Scarborough, whaz’zitz surely touched the hearts of the caring professionals in the social worker profession, be it the food bank, the after school program, the library literacy coach, the pre-school free food chef, or the Immigrant Welcoming Program assistant enabler. They would have known this guy, whaz’zitz. How many people can we count here? Pretend that I am The Amazing Kreskin: think of a number that you agree upon. Let us assign the variable x to this number. That is x humans who now have an empty spot in their lives because one of their clients is now being chopped up for spare parts, the rest so much worm friendly compost. These are caring people, you can see it on their resume, and reflected in the employer name on their pension plan. Yup, they care.
But what about the Main Stream Media? Whaz’zitz got a few pages in the press in the past. He was wonder boy, that which disproves Black stereotypes, before he was killed (was he the one chopped up with a machete? I forget). Surely the journos and the scribblers were touched to see that their world view was validated. Stereotypes are wrong and bad. How sad to see this shining disproving light plunged into darkness. How many people can we count here? Pretend that I am The Amazing Kreskin: think of a number that you agree upon. Let us assign the variable y to this number. That is y humans who now have an empty spot in their lives blah, blah, blah. These are caring people, etcetera, etcetera, right down to their pension plan. Yup, they care.
But what about activists? Whaz’zitz grew up in either Liberal or NDP ridings, surrounded by Liberal and NDP activists. Maybe a few Maoists, too. Anyway, surely (Similar to x and y) there are z activists who care about whaz’zitz. And, surely, there a few to no Tories that knew whaz’zitz. And far fewer than zero old guard Reform party members. No, the only activists that can claim a heartache over whaz’zitz are the members of the orange and red parties, all z of them. And all z can point to their party pay stubs and T-4s and free travel vouchers to workers rights conferences in Cuba to prove that Yup, they care.
This is quite a legion of caring people, all 13 + x + y + z of them. They have a diversity of caring professions. They come from a multi-cultural mosaic, which if the statistics are correct, is greater than 77 percent white. Their name is Legion. These are the people who, standing beside Baby Momma of No-Dad City, mourn deeply for whaz’zitz. Tears run down their faces as they read the sad story, in the same newspaper as the advertisements for a cruise they are going to take. A tear falls on an ad for faux-crocodile accessories from Betty Hemmings * . Not only are they paid to care, as part of their job description, but they approach the calendar date of their retirement year knowing the total pensionable hours of caring service they have contributed.
When one of the thirteen saw little cute whaz’zitz draw little cute Crips insignia on his blank mathematics test, she (he, it, he-she, whatever) did nothing but smile and look away. After all, Crips insignia is a healthy form of social rebellion against whatever. It makes working easier; and with social promotion, an optimal, no-hassle final solution. When x said nothing in defence of the notion of a healthy family means Mom, Dad, and the Kid, she (he, it, he-she, whatever) knew that whaz’zitz did not need a Dad to grow up. Too bad whaz’zitz is now dead and unable to disprove the racist notion that a fatherless bastard has a higher chance of falling into a criminal lifestyle. When y choose to not investigate, to not report, and to not fact check stories that may bring into question the validity of the, say, the fatherless bastard theory of criminal behavior, she (he, it, he-she, whatever) was advancing the activist cause. It is not propaganda when you are paid to write with a slant that slants against propaganda written by propagandists unpaid by your employer. And when z shrieked and shrilled about the massive crime, poverty, obesity, and empty food banks, they knew that only hiring more x + y + z , paying x + y + z more, would stop the massive crime, poverty, obesity, and empty food banks. Really, only a meanie could disagree with z, and, in order to show respect and embrace all viewpoints, these meanies and racists, must be called names and shouted down.
Who are these meanies who do not care about whaz’zitz? Well, if we take C as the population of Canada, then the number of those that do not care about whaz’zitz is a number less than C - (13 + x + y + z), which we shall designate as C` . Ultimately, this C` also subsumes the set of taxpayers. These are the people who do not care enough about whaz’zitz. Indeed, it is not the fault of those who had whaz’zitz in their day to day care, who were paid and pensioned to see that whaz’zitz did not end up dead like he did. Those who are responsible are not responsible. No, it is the people who pay the payroll and pensions of those that were closest and cared most about whaz’zitz who are responsible. They did not pay enough payroll and pensions. If only (13 + x + y + z) was bigger and better paid and had more paper and paper clips, then, well, whaz’zitz would not have ended up so non-stereotypically dead, a fluke of a cruel non-existant Christian God, like idiots driving slow in the fast lane, or running out of toilet paper, or your cat barfing up a hair ball when you are having sex.
The people responsible for whaz’zitz death are not the people responsible for whaz’zitz life up to the moment he was cut down (was he the guy decapitated with a machete? I forget). Really, only good stuff can be mapped over onto (13 + x + y + z) . It is a function of their existence that they are both responsible for the good and not responsible for the bad. And, they care too. They are paid to care, but not paid enough, and they need help, assistance, supplies, and professional development days. Given the eighty (as of 3:45 am, 04/12/2007) tragic, non-stereotypical murders in Toronto, multiplied by the (13 + x + y + z) people who cared, well, you have 80 * (13 + x + y + z) total caring people, who work in the troubled communities of North-East Toronto, and do not live there. This number is adding up. That is a lot of Kleenex. A lot of saplings planted to fight Global Warming in whaz’zitz name. And the new crop of 2008 is only a month away. A forest of hope that this non-stereotypical event will never happen again, and not happen again within the statistical average of one killing every five days. Hmmm. That is four more whaz’zitz between now and the unmentionable, un-politically correct Christmas Day.
Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Merry Holiday Festival!
Like you, I care. Like you, I want to be paid to care. Maybe you want a high paying, high caring job. Well, get out your credit card and sign up for a course or two in Racism Industry Careers at the Fenris Badwulf School of Telemarketing Excellence. Get the low down on the xyz of reduced white guilt and increased pension, pay, and perks!
Send me your money. Show that you care about whaz’zitz , subscript 80.
I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this.
Opinion at the lunch room table was a solid who cares. And in this, another bright-futured Black kid, sent into the ground, with a chorus of wailing baby mommas (no dad though, this is No-Dad City *, after all), and a line up of testifying scholars, journalists, and judiciary, all wringing their fingers over the shocking waste of potential. Yeah, sure.
Anyway, whats-his-name, lets just call him number eighty, or just whaz’zitz, is only going to be missed by those that knew him. He may get his picture in the paper if The Capitalist Sun does a new and improved Year of the Gun! as Boxing Day filler for a slow news day.
But what about his school teachers? Surely whaz’zitz is going to be mourned by his kindergarten teacher. Sure it was an unlucky thirteen years ago that whaz’zitz was a cute kid in her class, but our Canadian kindergarten teachers are a caring lot. This argument also applies to his grade one teacher, too. Infact, for all his home room teachers, from K to 12. That is thirteen humans who now have an empty spot in their lives because one of their students is now being chopped up for spare parts, the rest so much worm friendly compost. Yup, they care.
But what about his social workers? Growing up in the gritty new subdivision slums of the troubled neighbourhoods of North-East Scarborough, whaz’zitz surely touched the hearts of the caring professionals in the social worker profession, be it the food bank, the after school program, the library literacy coach, the pre-school free food chef, or the Immigrant Welcoming Program assistant enabler. They would have known this guy, whaz’zitz. How many people can we count here? Pretend that I am The Amazing Kreskin: think of a number that you agree upon. Let us assign the variable x to this number. That is x humans who now have an empty spot in their lives because one of their clients is now being chopped up for spare parts, the rest so much worm friendly compost. These are caring people, you can see it on their resume, and reflected in the employer name on their pension plan. Yup, they care.
But what about the Main Stream Media? Whaz’zitz got a few pages in the press in the past. He was wonder boy, that which disproves Black stereotypes, before he was killed (was he the one chopped up with a machete? I forget). Surely the journos and the scribblers were touched to see that their world view was validated. Stereotypes are wrong and bad. How sad to see this shining disproving light plunged into darkness. How many people can we count here? Pretend that I am The Amazing Kreskin: think of a number that you agree upon. Let us assign the variable y to this number. That is y humans who now have an empty spot in their lives blah, blah, blah. These are caring people, etcetera, etcetera, right down to their pension plan. Yup, they care.
But what about activists? Whaz’zitz grew up in either Liberal or NDP ridings, surrounded by Liberal and NDP activists. Maybe a few Maoists, too. Anyway, surely (Similar to x and y) there are z activists who care about whaz’zitz. And, surely, there a few to no Tories that knew whaz’zitz. And far fewer than zero old guard Reform party members. No, the only activists that can claim a heartache over whaz’zitz are the members of the orange and red parties, all z of them. And all z can point to their party pay stubs and T-4s and free travel vouchers to workers rights conferences in Cuba to prove that Yup, they care.
This is quite a legion of caring people, all 13 + x + y + z of them. They have a diversity of caring professions. They come from a multi-cultural mosaic, which if the statistics are correct, is greater than 77 percent white. Their name is Legion. These are the people who, standing beside Baby Momma of No-Dad City, mourn deeply for whaz’zitz. Tears run down their faces as they read the sad story, in the same newspaper as the advertisements for a cruise they are going to take. A tear falls on an ad for faux-crocodile accessories from Betty Hemmings * . Not only are they paid to care, as part of their job description, but they approach the calendar date of their retirement year knowing the total pensionable hours of caring service they have contributed.
When one of the thirteen saw little cute whaz’zitz draw little cute Crips insignia on his blank mathematics test, she (he, it, he-she, whatever) did nothing but smile and look away. After all, Crips insignia is a healthy form of social rebellion against whatever. It makes working easier; and with social promotion, an optimal, no-hassle final solution. When x said nothing in defence of the notion of a healthy family means Mom, Dad, and the Kid, she (he, it, he-she, whatever) knew that whaz’zitz did not need a Dad to grow up. Too bad whaz’zitz is now dead and unable to disprove the racist notion that a fatherless bastard has a higher chance of falling into a criminal lifestyle. When y choose to not investigate, to not report, and to not fact check stories that may bring into question the validity of the, say, the fatherless bastard theory of criminal behavior, she (he, it, he-she, whatever) was advancing the activist cause. It is not propaganda when you are paid to write with a slant that slants against propaganda written by propagandists unpaid by your employer. And when z shrieked and shrilled about the massive crime, poverty, obesity, and empty food banks, they knew that only hiring more x + y + z , paying x + y + z more, would stop the massive crime, poverty, obesity, and empty food banks. Really, only a meanie could disagree with z, and, in order to show respect and embrace all viewpoints, these meanies and racists, must be called names and shouted down.
Who are these meanies who do not care about whaz’zitz? Well, if we take C as the population of Canada, then the number of those that do not care about whaz’zitz is a number less than C - (13 + x + y + z), which we shall designate as C` . Ultimately, this C` also subsumes the set of taxpayers. These are the people who do not care enough about whaz’zitz. Indeed, it is not the fault of those who had whaz’zitz in their day to day care, who were paid and pensioned to see that whaz’zitz did not end up dead like he did. Those who are responsible are not responsible. No, it is the people who pay the payroll and pensions of those that were closest and cared most about whaz’zitz who are responsible. They did not pay enough payroll and pensions. If only (13 + x + y + z) was bigger and better paid and had more paper and paper clips, then, well, whaz’zitz would not have ended up so non-stereotypically dead, a fluke of a cruel non-existant Christian God, like idiots driving slow in the fast lane, or running out of toilet paper, or your cat barfing up a hair ball when you are having sex.
The people responsible for whaz’zitz death are not the people responsible for whaz’zitz life up to the moment he was cut down (was he the guy decapitated with a machete? I forget). Really, only good stuff can be mapped over onto (13 + x + y + z) . It is a function of their existence that they are both responsible for the good and not responsible for the bad. And, they care too. They are paid to care, but not paid enough, and they need help, assistance, supplies, and professional development days. Given the eighty (as of 3:45 am, 04/12/2007) tragic, non-stereotypical murders in Toronto, multiplied by the (13 + x + y + z) people who cared, well, you have 80 * (13 + x + y + z) total caring people, who work in the troubled communities of North-East Toronto, and do not live there. This number is adding up. That is a lot of Kleenex. A lot of saplings planted to fight Global Warming in whaz’zitz name. And the new crop of 2008 is only a month away. A forest of hope that this non-stereotypical event will never happen again, and not happen again within the statistical average of one killing every five days. Hmmm. That is four more whaz’zitz between now and the unmentionable, un-politically correct Christmas Day.
Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Merry Holiday Festival!
Like you, I care. Like you, I want to be paid to care. Maybe you want a high paying, high caring job. Well, get out your credit card and sign up for a course or two in Racism Industry Careers at the Fenris Badwulf School of Telemarketing Excellence. Get the low down on the xyz of reduced white guilt and increased pension, pay, and perks!
Send me your money. Show that you care about whaz’zitz , subscript 80.
I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this.
posted by Fenris Badwulf at 11:00 AM
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