A Special Election Announcement By CLIT

Hi, I'm Gemma Atkinson, on October 10, 2007, I want you to vote Mitch for Mayor of Mitchieville.

Aren't you tired of seeing all that man-meat Lisa drubs up every Friday? Aren't you sick of having berries and twigs dangled in front of your face all the time? Wouldn't you rather be looking at stunningly beautiful and well-endowed women like myself every day? Ya, you want to return to the good old days, don't you? Then you need to vote Mitch for Mayor on October 10.

I'll make you a deal: If you vote Mitch for Mayor, I promise to release the sex tape he and I made last year. I'm not joking when I say that it is the hottest tape ever made. The Mayor is just so manly and handsome and just the thought of how he ripped off my clothes, threw me on the bed and made savage love to me for three minutes several hours, makes me sweat directly from my goodie package.

Yes, I'm certainly voting Mitch for Mayor. He has always been so good to me, so giving, he ALWAYS satisfies me. You'd really have to be a total tool not to vote for him. He's everything in a Mayor, and more.

Brought to you by Concerned Ladies In Town (CLIT)