The Social Conservative Peril (part 1)

I am afraid of these people. All across our open-bordered multi-cultural mosaic of Global Village peoples, fear strikes into the heart of everyone at the latest mass murder caused by these heteronormative meanies. Little lil'kim looks up to her two daddies and is afraid she will be beheaded on her trip to peanut-free school; Her two daddies are afraid that their communal property rights and access to free HIV medication is in peril. No one is safe.

In stories widely reported and fact checked by the Main Stream Media, the growing pattern of crime and degenerate adult-man-adult-woman sexual preferences (ick!) becomes more vivid each day, like the rising of the Red Banner at dawn at the United Church:

The Massacre at Hannover: A youth gang of Mennonite youth seized a youth from a Calvinist youth gang. They took him, stripped him of his distinctive Calvinist clothing (t-shirt, jeans, sneakers) and then slowly beat him to death while Mennonite elders looked on, cheering and singing psalms filled with words glorifying violence, hatred of lesbians, and advocating murder of policelifeforms. None of the Social Conservatives called the responsible authorities.

The Gun Battle at Guelph: A youth gang of Baptists engaged in a running skirmish with a rival gang of Pentecostals. This horrible act of violence occured at a bus station, where mothers, children and transvestites were returning from a Red Banner celebration in honor of the reforestation of Katyn Wood. Over twenty people were involved. When wheelchair policelifeforms arrived, nobody came forward as a witness.

The Kidnapping, Torture, and Murder of Abortion Facilitators: In the heart of Toronto, at the Paedophiles Hospital, doctor Urkgob Fob-Kabob was seized in broad daylight and thrown into a van. Videotapes released later over the ensuing weeks showed poor Urkgob being stripped naked, beaten with rosaries, burnt with votive candles, and then dismembered. Body parts were found all over town, even during the Red Festival of Union Productivity. The last video released showed a fingerless Urkgob having his head sawn off with an electric knife, normally used to cut roast beef.

These horrible crimes continue to mount, and our one party government does nothing to protect the people, plants, and animals of this great Global Village.

(... Stay tuned for part 2, for more exciting tales of horror, and a cliff hanger final solution!)

I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this.

Cross posted at Dust My Broom, a place where endangered species can roam free.