How to put a Spell on a Cup of Coffee
Finally, a chance to do something practical with Astrology.
Tonight, I am forced to act the vassal and bring my leige-lord (boss) and his court (crew) an offering of food and drink. So, I bring coffee and donuts. But, as a follower of Set, The Snake God, I am going to put a spell on the coffee so that my boss is now enslaved to my will. So, how do I do this?
Preparation.
But the coffee and donuts in darkness. Buy them some hours before they will be eaten.
As they cool in your kitchen, say this prayer to The Bourgeois Viking War Gods Thor:
Wave your hands in an impressive way over the coffee and donuts. Microwave warm before you take them to work. Do not eat or drink first. Whoever sips first is going to be the glory boy of Thor, The Viking War God. This can be unpleasant, so let someone else do it.
This is another useful ritual from pagan antiquity.
Before the sun rises, eat an apple.
This will protect you from staying dead if you happen to get killed during the day light hours. If you are killed during the day (car accident? whatever), your body will gather itself together and you will return from the underworld. If you are getting involved with Thor, The Viking War God, this is good insurance in the event that you get killed.
It is usually quite painful to come back from the dead. You will be in a bad mood, a little stiff, but alive. Hopefully, you still have a passable set of clothes when you reanimate. They might be bloody and torn. It might be cold. You might scare the night shift guy at the morgue.
I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this at both Mitchieville and DustMyBroom.
Tonight, I am forced to act the vassal and bring my leige-lord (boss) and his court (crew) an offering of food and drink. So, I bring coffee and donuts. But, as a follower of Set, The Snake God, I am going to put a spell on the coffee so that my boss is now enslaved to my will. So, how do I do this?
Preparation.
But the coffee and donuts in darkness. Buy them some hours before they will be eaten.
As they cool in your kitchen, say this prayer to The Bourgeois Viking War Gods Thor:
O Thor!
Make my boss show me favor.
I know that you can do it.
You are powerful, and like to make yourself look good.
When my boss shows me favor
I will offer some of the spoils to your greatness, O Thor
You are a good God to have hanging around.
I enjoying watching you burn cities to the ground.
Place a spell on this coffee, O Thor
Make him victorious in War
Let him give me some of his spoils
Let him show me favor
Wave your hands in an impressive way over the coffee and donuts. Microwave warm before you take them to work. Do not eat or drink first. Whoever sips first is going to be the glory boy of Thor, The Viking War God. This can be unpleasant, so let someone else do it.
This is another useful ritual from pagan antiquity.
Before the sun rises, eat an apple.
This will protect you from staying dead if you happen to get killed during the day light hours. If you are killed during the day (car accident? whatever), your body will gather itself together and you will return from the underworld. If you are getting involved with Thor, The Viking War God, this is good insurance in the event that you get killed.
It is usually quite painful to come back from the dead. You will be in a bad mood, a little stiff, but alive. Hopefully, you still have a passable set of clothes when you reanimate. They might be bloody and torn. It might be cold. You might scare the night shift guy at the morgue.
I, Fenris Badwulf, wrote this at both Mitchieville and DustMyBroom.
posted by Fenris Badwulf at 3:51 AM
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