Good News!

Good News, good burgers of Mitchieville!

The Federal Government has granted a lavish sum upon the Ministry of Re-Education in order to further the policy of diversity and poly-genderism! It looks like young Dhung (Timmy) made a good impression upon the deputy minister on our trip to Bangkok! (And, a special thanks to those that have sent cards and flowers to Dhung in hospital … his torn rectum has been sutured and the ligature burns on his wrists and ankles are responding to treatment: the doctors promise me that he will heal up fast!)

The Ministry of Re-Education brings you Sargon the Magnificent, one of America’s foremost Financial Astrologers. Sargon currently resides in San Jose California. He is the author of such books as Astrology for Capricorns, Financial Astrology, and Astrology for Mind Control. Sargon sits on the board of several corporations, including Mars-Vulcan Heavy Industries, Knights Templar Holdings, and General Motors. He also has co-authored several training manuals for the United States Air Force, especially the definitive Astrology for Counter-Force Strategy in Total Nuclear War, and Astrology for Personnel Management in an Armed Forces Setting.

Each week, Sargon will bring you a weekly horoscope to guide you in your journey to enlightenment. As well, he will share with you excerpts from his fascinating new book, as yet untitled.

Loyal Fenris Badwulf, Minister of Re-Education